I got home from my date…a little early.
The desire to find someone to make out with was discouraging and strong, but I had resisted the urge to kiss a guy I had no desire to see again. I had to think about my goal a lot during that date. Non committal affection has a familiar, strong pull, but it’s that rush of a make out that leaves me feeling more empty and alone than I intend on feeling in the first place. So here I am in my kitchen with my kids. They had that disappointed, <sigh> ‘mom probably didn’t find a husband tonight’ look on their faces so I decided to share my success with them.
I said, “Hey, you know why I’m home before you’re in bed? Because I was virtuous. Do you know what virtue means?” I opened the Bible to Proverbs 31: 10 and read, “Who can find a virtuous woman? For her price is far above rubies… So, tonight your Mom chose to be virtuous and that means I’m awesome like a ruby”. Could they tell I didn’t believe what I said? I felt far from valuable.
I then set the scriptures aside and (honestly? I…) wondered where I could get some ice cream. I had barely given up on feeling good about this situation when my daughter followed me into the family room and said, “Mom look what you are wearing!” She pointed to the scriptures sharing the extended wisdom on virtue she found after I had walked away.
She joyfully read in verse 22: “She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple.” She said it again, “Look, Mom, your shirt is silk and purple!” I felt a wave of peaceful joy wash over me. I had not only acted virtuous, I was wearing the outfit of virtue. As she walked back into the kitchen smiling, I realized that there was a little more to this prized characteristic than I was striving for. It brought a smile to my face. I was virtuous and I was an example of virtue to my children. This felt good enough…that I might just do it again.